my library adventure went off track, i havent even read blogs properly, and i havent blogged properly myself...oh well, it was worth the chance that michael may have blogged.

Michael got a blog, but i dont think he is going to write in it. what a poo.

i think i might like a holiday.
if i go away for long enough, maybe the mobile phone company will forget about me.

Even went to tafe today. We were doing speeches. Everyone was talking about very informative topics like crop signs, dogs, the indigenous Japanese peoples, and I got up and spoke about howie and ryans scootering adventures. I wrote about 10 words on a piece of paper at 830 this morning, very organised Joanna. But I almost made it to 3 minutes. People even laughed.
the rest of tafe today was filled with heated discussions. I should have given up heated discussions for lent. I really like tafe people though, good normal sillyness, not much crap, just value fun.
and we think we may have found a house. Its ok. Barbs and I decided it had a "nice feel".

blah blah blah blah, blahblah, blah blah blah

theres a bit to blog... should probably start with an apology (esp to tom helen and kaye) for my ratehr shocking attitude today in regards to being kind in our community. ill try and be gooder.
sundays are turning into incredibly long days. preparing dinner was the most fun, i had a ball. singing away, ripping up lettuce and portioning out cheese - good fun.
today felt very community like.
and last night, that was great fun. i have never been to a wedding reception before, let alone worked at one. was great. actually, ive never done bar work before either, but it all worked out fine. i was left alone with lots of people wanting drinks for alot of the time, which was a little scary. lots of funny people, good spontanious conversations. amazing amounts of alcohol. everyone was dancing and having a great old time. gavin and i joined in after the caterers left, also while they were there and we werent doing anything. lots of all ages dancing away.
yeah, i liked.

I really don't like going to the doctor, its not as bad as the dentist, but still, pretty bad.
I was expecting worse though. Normally I go to this doctor that's sort of like a medical centre. But today I went to the one up the road cause it was walking distance, and cause my dad offered to drop in later and pay, so I wasn't worried about bulk billing and such.
the doctor was even nice. He tested my blood pressure and got me to touch my nose and push stuff and watch stuff all around the room. It was kind of weird actually. By the time I was in the doctors office, I was in a fair bit of pain, so I wasn't the most pleasant of patients. I wasn't quiet sure why I was touching my nose.
either way, he game me a pile of drugs and off I went. Anti-histamines, pain killers and some anti-biotic. He also told me to drink a big glass of half lemonade, half water with some salt every 2 hours...I was confused like the nose thing. Didn't think to ask, just said yes, took my script and off to the chemist I went.
popped my pills and I must say, those pain killers are a gem. I'm feeling very drowsy. I think all 3 of the packets said id get drowsy. But my head isn't hurting as much so IM a happy chappy. Although he said he thinks its a migrane, and that this might be the start of me suffering from them - and that's no fun.
I really want to go on the train challenge. I don't want to miss out on free train day :(

...I'm going to have a winge...

in the last 2 days, I have been out of my house for approximately 3 hours, and that was when I tried to go to tafe today but it didn't work. I'm so incredibly bored but everytime I get up I think my brain (or whatever's in my head) is going to fall out my eyes or my ears or down my spine. I thought I was dying, but my mum came home from her bible study and told me that I have dust allergies. She picks up great diagnoses from all sorts of fun places. The park said there might be mould in my walls and I was reacting to that.
according to mums new theory, ill be better tomorrow. Swapped rooms for now with James cause my rooms dustier cause its messier.
I'm ready and willing to wake up tomorrow feeling better!

now even my brother has a blog!

no one would ever guess our mother was an english teacher, with my shocking spelling and his complete lack of full stops or any other grammer for that matter.

and welcome to lots of new people on my links list...dont worry, if you dont update i have no problem deleting you

blogger spellcheck doesn't know the word blogging...


and i just spellchecked that sentance and it didnt know blogger or spellcheck either

My head hurts more today.
I had a massive list of things to do today that I thought about while staring at the ceiling in bed this morning, not wanting to get up and do any of them...They included...
-washing my car
-updating my group work log
-cleaning my room (big job)
-sorting out and throwing out stuff down stairs
-doing other tafe work
-looking at small group stuff
-I'm sure there were more too

I got through a fairly big portion of my room when I started to feel sick again. So I have laid on the couch with a headache since then. Television is fantastic. Especially tv1, I love watching all those shows the commercial channels don't put on anymore...Like who's the boss, and bewitched - quality.

I'm also very excited with the new arrivals to the blogging world. When I started there were barely any other girls, good to see we are well represented now.

i think i should probably learn to obey the law more. or at least obey the law more joyfully, or probably delevop some sort of respect for the government and their laws.

free travel day on thursday!

ive been learing a new skill recently. when you dont do assessments the night before, you can do drafts. it takes a bit of a perpspective altering cause you dont have to write as if its your fianl copy, and this is great, very useful, cause you can edit it over and over again and it might get better. very tops. the other great thing about doing your assessments before they are due and going to tafe, is that your tafe teachers will mark them and tell you which bits are wrong or bad and you can go and fix them and hand them in again up until due date.

Occasionally ill have these moments, where I realise again that I am a little strange.

apart from visiting an ethiopian church and having scootering guests, my weekend was full of lots of other stuff. like the baptism yesterday arvo, that was very nice. i got to go in the water with becky. was speical, wish i was more 'there' in my head for her.
i went straight home after that, fell asleep on the louge for a few hours then moved to my bed. didnt even manage to wake up for tafe this morning...ops not very good jo

i still feel bit sick. much better then yesterday. i was okish in the morning, maybe i ate too much food.

yesterday - i woke up at about 830, got ready and talked to my mum about the occupents in my brothers room. we had a good laugh and thought them very silly. i got picked up my michelle at 930 off we went to regents park, leaving all belrose activity.
we went and found the church, and saw all the other st stephens people hanging around. we all had a laugh because they had told us 1030, and all of us were there at 1030, but it was pointed out we were probably running on africian time...so we went and had a coffee (me a coke) and came back ready to start.
the service was good, interesting, and long. what made it longer is that we couldnt understand 80% cause it was all in ethiopian (actually they dont speak ethiopian but i forget what their language is called). but it was nice all the same hearing them sing, very beautiful. and the kids there, oh my goodness, they were all stunning, i cant belive one room of people could produce such amazing looking kids.
jamie gibbons from our church gave a talk. it was good. about culture and difference and guarding our hearts from the bad stuff our culture in australia is about.
after the service eventually ended, the chairs were all moved around and some tables appeared and it was lunch time. i was looking forward to lunch time. i made 2 friends, 10 year old girl micleets, and a 12 year old girl peace (or sarah or shalom). they helped me pick the yummiest food, and taught me how to eat it. we werent suposed to use our cutlery, just rip of bits of this pancake thing and pick up bits of food with it. made for very messy eating, but alot of fun. these 2 girls talked and talked and talked. very cute. after lunch they took me round and intoduced me to all the cool young people. i met lydia, she was nice, she showed me pictures of a wedding she was a bridesmade in and i bought chocolates for her yr 12 formal.
then the 2 or 3 of us girls, went round and hugged all the babies.
suddenly it was 3 and we had to leave.
they all said that they would come and visit our church soon, and im sure we will all go back. some of the young people might come to soul aswell.
good fun. probably too much food. i think that may have been some of the cause of feeling sick.
(the day was also filled with lots of flashbacks...i was sitting next to sarah in the service, and i kwpt turning to her to translate for me, and in the prayers knowing when to open your eyes again just by listening out my amen (much luckier here then in romanina cause they dont say it 50 times) and eating lots of strange yummy food)

done worry anyone, they are both still alive.

my phone rang at 4:14am. i went out to my front gate, and they were sitting in the gutter. they looked and sounded tired but still had that same crazy vibe to them that made them go and do something silly like this in the first place. quick game of frisbee aswell. when i suggested they just stop and go to sleep here, they both responded enthusiasticly and without delay. so we trundled inside. no sooner had i shut the door behind us, did it start to rain fairly heavily. so its definatly a good thing they are now asleep in my brothers room.

i might go back to sleep for a few hours too.

but dont worry castles and frenchs, they are alive and well.

Half the weekend done and done. Big day today.
woke up and tried to make phone calls and get my brain into gear, tried to help mum clean up, kept a eye on our crazy landlord as he climbed the roof and ladders, had discussion with father and mother, went and had lunch with barbs and continued discussion.
then I went off to church to set up.
had to escape for a while in the middle as I felt as if I was loosing the plot some more.
came back with a slightly better attitude.
the "big night" was had. Kids had fun, people got into it
packed up. Tried to start as early as possible so we could leave, though I just got home anyway. So tired, maybe just drained.
so much stuff all over the church. For one night, that's a lot of work.
now I'm home, I'm going to have another shower (3rd for the day) and then go to sleep for a little bit, wake up and give 2 kind of strange but mildly charming boys a drink at some ridiculous hour when they arrive at my house as a pit stop on their scootering adventure.
tomorrows another big one, ethiopian church service which is apparently 3 hours long with some lunch at the end, and then straight back for peoples baptism, then church. If I hadn't have taken last Monday off tafe, id have taken this one.

i feel like im just plodding along at the moment, things are happening that should excite me, but im just plodding through it. havent been feeling my normal self much recently, not sure why, actually maybe i can think of a couple of reasons, not any good ones though.
ended up spending the whole evening on the phone. i want a bath and a sleep. thats a great idea. maybe if i stop for a while, when i get back up ill be normal again.

we have to move, and that doesnt make me excited. maybe itl be fun, a whole new room to get messy.
but no more will i have my front yard for pie fights and parties and other fun activites, and no more fence to get set alight, and no more screeching cars round the corner, and no more side street to sit in a talk to people...awww.

we saw camp last night, it was alright. went to maccas, i love maccas. sal drove me home and we got to catch up, i like sal.

so many fat days all in a row i havent had time to blog. i only caught up on reading blogs this morning.
so what have i done? scripture seminars, holy spirit seminar, meaders meetings, multiple trips to and from hornsby, tafe, bit of sleeping and just enjoying being broke.
scriputre seminars were great, got me excited about schools work. there were some great kids, they were all asking some great questions and were mostly all really open to what was being said. i enjoyed.
holy spirit seminar was good too. i was so tired, my mind kept wondering in the talk bit. but the bit i was paying attention for was good.
tafes been good. ive decided wednesdays are stressful days. first class is social justice and human rights were we have to sit around in different groups and discuss issues - can be a little intense at times, lots of different passionate views in the one room. then we have stressful plan and conduct group, which can just be argh. then we have legal practises which is sitting around disscussing different cases and duty of care etc etc... and its our longest day, it just goes on and on. but its still a fun course, starting to get worried about all the assesments though
and im broke, oh i hate being broke. i think i started working before i was 14, so i havent had to ask my parents for money since then. i hate it. i just hate not having my own money. hate it hate it hate it.

there is a red car sitting in the driveway thats almost mine.

im tired. on friday i was tired, and now its sunday and i have to go back to tafe tomorrow and im probably tireder

i like alot of being a youth leader. i like the kids, they are alot of fun. they make me feel special, even a scary special cause i dont feel like i should be that special. they are special.

the words on the page dont look right, i think ill definatly use spell check tonight.

ive been saying and doing some stupid things recently. it makes me think, oh dear where have my brains gone.

there is alot of macdonalds in my life.

kayes going to blog tomorrow, isnt that great?

"prayer is posh and powerful"

stupid bloody html. now i have an ugly blog, uglier than before.

last night, kara, nicole and myself went and saw the fighting tempations. i already decided i liked it before i saw it because its an MTV movie, and i do like mtv...although they have had some dodgy ones in the past. but this one, this one was good, we sang and danced along, throughly enjoyed it, even though we had some adversery...

-manderin cinima seats are very uncomfotable
-a shooting game we tried to play stole our money
-the guy serving us at the candy bar got our drinks wrong about 3 times
-the guy who checked our tickets sent us into the wrong cinima
-the movie at first was playing on half the screen, half the ceiling

but we were the only ones in the cinima, and thats always fun, and all the hicups added to our enjoyment. i have a big soft spot for feel good, low level of deep message kinda movies.

we had our first proper group meeting for our assessment today. top notch location of dee why pub. i was impressed. we were productive aswell, set our rules and aims and goals and almost started a plan but got distracted but lunch. we all had a drink or 2 and were very sleepy for our 2pm legal class.
i didnt get that much of a headache from today either, we all seemed to work much better in a social environment. the group dynamics did stress me out a little. truth be told, the more stressful the better, makes for exciting group logs which makes for better marks. as long as no one gets too upset or damaged, its all good, bring it on.

good on tafe strikes. i love a sleep in. and on the other hand, i do hope they are successful in their protests. funding cuts and huge increases on fees means lots of annoyed people, and its not the way tafe should be

too many late nights

trips on public transport are much funner when you have someone with you. hornsby to chatswood went ok cause i was almost asleep, but when i got to chatswood i wasnt looking forward to waiting for the bus or the actual ride, but low and behold, there was micheal. i had a friend to chat with. hes an interesting fella, he wants to be a policemen. if you looked at him you wouldnt think he would be the type, but hes decent about it, really passionate about doing obeying the law and stopping criminals in their tracks. either way it was good to have someone to chat to and keep me awake. hes going to be catching the 1130 bus all the time now, so i might see him again. we could start a little group for the poor souls that live in our hole of a suburb with no trains.

AND...i finally won that game with the headlights! no one else was on the bus to beat me, so i didnt even have to cheat! excellent

i enjoyed commy dinner tonight, and hannah minding this arvo. so so hot. but no community dinner for 3 months is a bit sad.

and last night was good fun. i love boats. there was a half naked fat man on board too, that made me laugh. howie and i do fun silly things sometimes, im glad we arent all snotty and romanitc and go out to fancy smacy resturants and wear dresses, macdonalds and boats are much more fun.

tafe was interesting today. spent the first half counselling each other. we all felt really stupid as we made up problems and said things like "sounds like you're feeling blah", "how does that make you feel?", "just to clarify, you mean blah blah", and some other textbook phrases. all pretty humouress. we did a big "feelings" chart with lots of synonyms for different emotions to help us when reflecting feelings with clients.
the second half of the day was interesting too. we all sat in groups and disscussed issues. things like third world debt, same sex marriges, teen pregnancy etc. i think the aim of the excersise was to learn how to form opinions about things before talking with clients and understand different value systems. it was odd. i think its cause im surrounded by people who share alot of the same thoughts on social justice issues and what not, but i get so shocked when i hear some peoples responses. it was like when i discovered that there were people who thought all the government policy about illegal immigrants was good. i try to be educated enough to form decent responses, but im not. i think compassion is important though.

the 3rd and final blog thought i had for today, was about forgiveness.
i think it sucks. its fun and easy and makes you feel good when someones called you a poohead or something, but when its something serious and really bad, what are you suposed to do? i dont know how to forgive this person. i can say "i forgive them" in my head and be fine with that, im happy for God to love the person, and other people that i dont know can too, but i dont personally want to have to deal with it, or have any one close to me dealing with it. i would much rather just know they were alive and somewhere else. forgive in theory, not practice. i seem to be one of only a few in a group that are having problems forgiving this person. its really bothering me. especially being the token christian, being the only one who doesnt want to see or talk to them is stupid. but i dont see how a person would act now. its definatly not a nice situation, but it seems to be one that is current.

i like kaye alot. i think our outbursts, or "moments" could be annoying to others at times, but they are great fun and very useful. its good to make sense to someone, and be loud. things seem to really stick in your head and be impactful alot more when you've yelled them through with kaye.
and she should get a blog too.

i got some new shoes, and 2 new tops. thanx barbs.
the shoes look like 80s grandpa shoes. i like them alot.
problem with buying new clothes and stuff these days, is i dont have much care factor. i used to care a little bit, but now i generally do it out of nessicity and try and make it as less painful as possible. very quick, no fuss, cheap purchases are my favourite. i still like going to shops, and buying things other than clothing, and i do still get excited when i get home with my new stuff, just actually buying clothing is annoying.
but now i have shoes i can wear in the rain. that makes me a happy girl

im going to like the rain again this afternoon, after i purchase some new shoes without holes in them.

BIG BLUE BALLON THAT BRIGHTENED UP A RAINY DAY

hannah and i went on a huge adventure today, it was massive, im exhausted...shes still energetic, im buggered.
we caught the train to chatswood, ate maccas, bus to manly, had an icecream, ferry to the city, chips, then train home. and in chatswood there were lots of people walking around with big ballons, and hannah got reallu excited. we had to have a bit of a search, but we found them in toys r us. the coolest ballon ever, it was so big, and it didnt even "go bang". we could let the air out and blow it up again when we wanted. good fun
i got wet and a bit cold. but im warm now, looking forward to an evening on television.

i got very energetic for a minute or two when i got home from tafe just before. i was going to make the 3 or 4 phone calls i had to, then reply to all the emails i should have, and do some work on my tafe assessments...so far ive got through the phone calls, but stuck in these emails. you see you get a pretty purple arrow when you reply to each email, which motivates me more to reply to them all, but then im writing stupid replys to things that dont need replys. so i havent got very far, that and the 26 page annual vesrty report i started to read.

dont think that blog feed does actually cut off after 3 full stops. my last post had lots more then 3 and didnt cut off for ages.

I'm really excited about tomorrow night. I'm having a yr 6-8 girlie pizza and movie night at my house. Funny girls they are.
they are going to being some friends, that's mostly good. They do keep multiplying though, and that's normally something a youth group would get excited about, except its supposed to be a small group, and it isn't very small. I seem to have got all the good little evangelists in my group. Good for them, little scary for me though.
we are going to watch "Freaky Friday", which is a fun disney movie about a mum and a daughter switching places. all very soppy, but good value. very safe too, no swearing or sex or drugs or other such evils. i wont be getting in trouble by any parents.

Some girls get chocolate and jewelry teddy bears and boring mushy stuff like that...But I, I get frisbees and donuts and giant balloon sculpture flowers!

tafe is still reasonably fun too.
do you know overseas students pay $9000 a year for my course?!?! i was complaining i had to pay $750, my goodness. and thats only for one year, the course is 2 years.
most of the teachers are going on strike next week, we are going to the pub. very good of us really. na, its honestly all for an assessment... well its suposed to be. we have to complete a task in groups, and we get assessed on documenting the gorup process, it doesnt really matter if your group sucks or the task you complete goes horribly wrong, just document the process and you pass. but our group doesnt seem to be getting along too well, so we are going to the pub to bond. for those who were in steves group session in avalon - we are in the "forming stage", with a bit of "storming".
wednesdays are the best days at tafe. all subjects that i like, like law stuff and ethics and human rights... thats all fun, but unfortunalty we have group process in the middle. its like when i played daytona, i get to competitive or something, too task oriantated. i always have a headache after that class.

ok, time to blog.

good news, helen is breathing again. had a fun outing to the medical centre. it was like a helen and jo outing full of fun just with breathing difficulties and nebulizers and a strange medical centre thrown in the middle of it.

so very indecisive at the moment. was going to go to tinkus birthday dinner, realised i didnt really have the funds, would have had travel difficulties and hadnt rsvpd - but still i managed to feel indecisive.

then i was suposed to hang out with kara. then we were going to go watch a dvd in hornsby, but it was decided we wouldnt go, then i didnt even see kara and then i ended up with helen in a medical centre...its a funny old world. i never quite know what ill end up doing.

been a good couple of days. lots of familyness. really positive experiences out of something sad. i like my family. i can now say that yes, i have picked up values and character bits from them or because of them. and thats good, not bad. i remember arguing till the cows come home with a friend about how i was not a product of my enviroment. what a silly little trip i was on. i dont know what i had against being a product of my environment, but i was dead set against it. but im quite happy to say that experiences, people, and different environments have shaped me. if i sat in a hole in the ground on my own for my life so far, i would not be the person i am today. thats pretty obvious really.