I have decided to stop blogging. I think I'll have more personal communications. I really like the idea of blogs, and I enjoy reading them and having one of my own...but I just don't think I can be as honest as I need to be. I've been really challenged about being honest recently, and I want to share things with people but my blog just isn't the right place to do it.
so farewell blog world! see you in real life

Blackstump hey
Got back this evening and then went out to the movies. We saw 'got served' or something like that, whatever it was it was dodgy. Nup, didn't like it. Strange movie seeing experience though. I went with Tim and pip and some others, people who I don't hang out with as often anymore. The others didn't talk to me at all, it was so strange. I think somethings happened I'm not aware of. Anyway, Not upset about it actually, it feels weird, but oh well. Tim and pip are fun. Going to go adventuring with Tim on Saturday, I'm scared.
Blackstump, hmmm. Full on, hard, enjoyable, funny, silly, not much sleep, community, different, krispy kreme, new, challenging, learning, relaxing, friendships, bonding, significant, tiring, draining, crazy weather, great...Some more adjectives that I can't articulate just yet. It's good to be home though. Don't think I could have handled any longer, so much physical, emotional, spiritual and other also draining...I'm going to sleep in a lot tomorrow. Then make some decisions and do some work.
I learnt a lot about community this weekend, not in the way I would have expected too. And a lot of about myself.
Outback hippies are so cool.
Freedom

I always get so annoyed when I finish books, the endings never satisfy me. grr. Stupid book. I don't want to fill all my travelling time reading a book that ends with annoying ambiguity, or in the complete wrong way! argh. so very frustrating.
I've been a little impulsive today. I wanted to dye my hair, wasn't particuarly fussed what colour, just wanted something different then the usual boring shade of brown my hair has been forever apart from a few streaks and occasional shade lighter or darker. I went for 'darkest brown', its turned out pretty much black. Oooops. Ah well, its definitely different...And not permanent - 6 to 8 weeks no worries. Might shampoo twice tomorrow see if I can't lighten this extreme.

And the carrolls have gone. Super sad. I cried so much when I said goodbye to them at ernies big night. Actually the whole of ernies big night was a bit of an emotional experience for a variety of reasons.
I saw the carrolls again in chatswood the day before they left by accident. That was nice to say a happy goodbye. Becky's been emailling me lots already which is good. I like the carrolls so much.
actually the last week or so has been a bit significant - goodbye to the carrolls, ebn excitement, team leading for the first time, special birthdayness, and now blackstump. It sort of feels significant.
But I'm just feeling annoyed that its raining. I sure hope its raining where it helps otherwise how very annoying, I don't want to camp in the rain.